My First Break From Blogging and Chinese Hospitality
October 6th, 2007 by Stephen Cronin (1,597 views)After 4 months of blogging, I had my first enforced break and have been away from my computer for 5 days. I didn’t really miss it much - a few pangs now and then, some minor guilt about people expecting replies to comments, but mostly I just really enjoyed being with my family.
In my last post, I said I wanted to get back to my stated topic, web development. However, before I do so, I am going to take the opportunity to write about our holiday and Chinese hospitality.
For those of you who don’t know, I live in China. There’s a lot I’d like to write about China, so I may come back to this topic in future. I may start a separate blog for my China writings, but for now I’ll include them here.
Chinese National Day Golden Week
October 1st is Chinese National Day and marks the start of a Golden Week holiday. We normally just stay at home during Golden Week holidays because travelling is a nightmare.
It is estimated that 120 million people travelled during this holiday. Trying to book flights / trains / hotels etc is difficult. If you’re successful, you’re in for an uncomfortable experience - people will be crammed into every available space. To top it off, the prices are two to three times higher than normal.
It’s not just travelling that’s a problem. Most of China’s 1.3 billion people are on holiday, so the shops / streets / tourist attractions are jam-packed with people. And I mean jam-packed. All in all, it’s normally better to relax at home and leave travel and tourism for a quieter period.
This holiday we decided to venture out and accept the invitation of a good friend. Fortunately, we weren’t travelling by public transport. We were travelling by private car and enjoying some famous Chinese hospitality.
Chinese Hospitality
Our friend invited us to spend the holiday with his family. When you receive an invitation such as this, you’ll learn that Chinese hospitality is fantastic, although at times it can be overbearing for Westerners.
They made us feel as though we were part of the family, provided us with accommodation and food, and tried to keep us entertained. One night they even gave up their own bed for us. Our friend’s family is quite well off, but I’ve found this kind of hospitality throughout China, regardless of wealth.
So what did we do? Mostly we just relaxed with his family and ate (more on that below). We also went on several outings, including a day in Tianjin.
One night we stayed in the Zhengan Palace Hotel in Grand Epoch City, which is a huge luxury resort. It is truly epic in scale and combines a modern facility with classic Chinese architecture. There’s a golf course and a variety of other sports and activities. Luxury resorts are not really my scene, but it was well worth the look.
For trivia buffs and soccer fans, Real Madrid stayed here in 2005. Michael Owen, David Beckham and Zinedine Zidane feature in the hotel’s pamphlet, in that order. We also saw a German camera crew setting up to shoot a movie, but I have no idea what it’s called.
Banquets, Banquets, Banquets
Everyday, for lunch and dinner, there was a banquet. The food was delicious! If you’ve never tried real Chinese food, I can assure you it is far superior to the food you get in Chinese restaurants in the West. For those not familiar with Chinese dining, each person does not have an individual meal. Instead, many dishes are placed in the centre of the table and you help yourself to a little of everything.
There is a strong drinking culture amongst the men, with toasting throughout the meal. Normally the drink is baijiu (a lethal spirit), although red wine or beer may be used instead. Often the toaster will say ganbei, which literally means dry glass. For some reason, most Chinese think Cheers means the same thing. Either way, you’re expected to drain your glass.
I’ve often heard people complaining about having to drink too much or eat dishes they didn’t like. I fell into this trap myself early on during my time in China. I’ve since learned it’s fine to say no, or that you don’t like something.
With food, the host may pressure you a little more (it’s considered polite for the host to offer), but they will normally accept this. However, there are right ways and wrong ways to say no. Sometimes, it is better to say yes, then just not eat it. Actually saying no can lead to a loss of face for your host. You may find that it’s harder to get the host to accept no when it comes to drinking, as it is considered a courtesy for the host to get you to drink.
For a Westerner being pressured to do something you don’t want to do can be very annoying. We expect that if we say we don’t like something, the host will respect our wishes and not raise it again. At times it takes all my patience to remember that I’m dealing with a different culture here and that the reason they keep asking is that they are being courteous by their standards. If they don’t ask, they don’t care about me.
I’ve lived in China for 3 years in total, but I’m still learning how to deal with this. I think I was a little rude to our hosts at times, but hopefully I made up for it with the arm wrestling competition!
The Final Word
We had a great holiday and enjoyed some great Chinese hospitality. Now, its back to everyday life… If you have had any experience with Chinese hospitality I’d like to hear about your experiences.
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I bet that you have learned so much about Chinese culture and behaviors. Just hoping that you won’t get stuck with those bad one.
Quote: “For a Westerner being pressured to do something you don’t want to do can be very annoying. ”
Not just to the westerner, it’s annoying to me (pure Chinese) too. It’s very annoying when people ask you to do something you don’t like. We all know that. However, losing face in Chinese culture make Chinese a jerk sometimes.
Chinese usually ask themselves how much the “face” actually worth? We knew it worth nothing. It’s just not easy to put it off, if they don’t have self-esteem.
does anybody force you to blog ??? it sounds like this because you said you enjoy the time with the family. you can enjoy your family every day instat of blogging don`t you ??? remeber you do blogging for fun !?
Terence, There are lots of great things about Chinese culture that offsets any negatives. Good point - I guess it is annoying to everyone. My Chinese friends just seem to handle it much better to me. I have to work hard to respect the culture and make sure that it’s not me who’s the jerk
Hoto, I really enjoyed blogging, probably too much. I work all day, then come home and blog. Sometimes I am guilty of not spending enough time with my family. I’m always trying to find the right balance. But for five days, there was no work, there was no blogging, there was just family. And I enjoyed it!
I am so much enjoying the vacation time in China. I just can’t stand the big environment in China. People spit and smoke like there is no others.
I am glad that you enjoy the time with family. I tried not to spend too much time on the Internet, which is my primary job.
Anyway, I guess that you will have greater chance to see the Olympic game in 2008.
By the way, I would love to hear your opinion about the 2008 Olympic in China and what impact to the economic after the game. I heard there will be a big drop in economic after the game. What do you think?
Looking forward to hearing from you!
Terence,
Yes, the spitting and smoking (and littering) gets to me at times, but I still love it here.
Unfortunately, it’s likely we’ll move back to Australia before the Olympics start. I’d start an Olympic Watch / Countdown blog, if we were staying, focusing on the build up to the Olympics and Chinese culture for people who may visit.
I think history shows that most countries experience a surge in the economy before the Olympics and a drop afterwards. I’m not sure how this will affect China, as it’s surging already. There may be a relative drop afterwards, but I think it will still be going forward.
I was in China for the Mid-Autumn Festival this year and made the mistake of traveling to Guilin, one of the country’s most popular tourist destinations.
We took a bus into town from the airport and when we tried to get a cab to a restaurant in the guidebook, no one would take us there. They took us to a different restaurant they ‘recommended’, which was WAY over-priced and not that good. Of course, we saw the taxi driver go inside the restaurant after dropping us off to get his cut of our bill.
The scenery on the boat ride down the Li River was great but hard to enjoy because of all the other boats there taking advantage of the peak tourist season. The river was so packed we actually bumped into another cruise ship! Yangshuo, at the end of the cruise, was prettier and I wish we had stayed there instead.
It was nice to see a new part of the country but I would recommend not traveling in China during holiday seasons. Getting away from the pollution in Guangzhou and swimming in the hotel pool made the trip definitely worth it though!
Gabriella,
I’ve been to Guilin and loved it! I was lucky enough to avoid most of the traps because we were accompanied by a Chinese friend who made sure we got to the real local restaurants, only paid half the list price in the hotel etc. I agree about Yangshuo - I only had one afternoon there, but it seems it would have been a really nice place to stay a few days.
I totally agree with you about not travelling during the peak tourist season. There are so many people in China that it’s always busy, but at the peak times it is just too much. I’d rather stay home!
As for Guangzhou, I have never seen anywhere where the pollution was so bad! It’s terrible there!
Steve:
Too bad that you only have one afternoon at Yangshuo.
I was there twice in one year. I very much enjoy the stay. Things have changed around YangShuo.
I have post about the trip at YangShuo.
Backpack Journey 2007 - Yang Shuo - Enjoy your Chinese life
I hate to travel in China while everyone is traveling. In many case, it looks like a moving black carpet.
Since you are very close to the north side of the China, you should already know the dust storm in China. It’s horrible!
Steven,
The pollution in Guangzhou is unbearable, but the worst part about it is that you actually get used to it!
Hi Terence,
Thanks for the link to your post. I remembered your post and actually thought of adding the link myself, but I was a bit rushed when I replied. Anyone reading this should go and check your post out - it’s great!
I’d like to go back to Yangshuo myself sometime, but it’s not likely anytime soon. Too many other places to travel and no time!
Moving black carpet - very descriptive! Yes I know all about the dust storms. They can last days and dump bucket loads of dust / sand on the streets. It gets inside the house, even if the windows are closed. Fortunately, they weren’t bad this year, but last year was terrible.
Hi Gabriella,
Yes, it’s sad that you get used to it, isn’t it! I know some people who don’t - they just can’t stand it - but I don’t really notice it (until a bright blue sunny day comes along).
I used to live near Guangzhou, but now I live in Hebei (up near Beijing) and the pollution is much better here - though still bad compared to Australia, which is where I’m from.
We are planning a trip to China soon, and I just wanted to say thank you for a really informative post to your blog. I enjoyed reading it!
Hi Alpharetta. China’s a great place to visit… I’ve actually just started a new blog on living and working in China because I want to write about it more - although there’s only a couple of posts yet.
Anyway, I hope you get to China and I hope you have a great time!
[…] This doesn’t just apply to new acquaintances. Friends and relatives often do the same. When a friend visits your house, it’s polite to offer them a cigarette. It’s part of Chinese hospitality. […]
Very interesting soccer stars that have stayed there. What about Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano hasn’t stayed there to my knowledge. But maybe he will next time Real Madrid come to town - he still wants to play in Spain…
By the way, many people would mark your comment as spam. You’d probably be better off leaving the link out and using Cristiano Ronaldo as your name - many bloggers won’t know the difference and you’ll get the same benefit. Just a thought…
Thanks for sharing. I have been thinking about traveling to China, it’s nice to have an idea of what to look forward to.
CF, no worries - visiting China is definitely worth it…
I’m of to China on businesss and for a holiday next month. thanks for tipping me off!
Cottages,
Have fun. It’s a great place - although frustrating at times…
Always do business transactions over a cup of green tea and never refuse one when offered!
Villa,
Green tea is very important here - although if you can do business over a cup of green tea, you’re lucky! It’s often done over many glasses of baijiu…
The first time I stayed in china was a great experience. I visited my mom who was teaching at Peking University. One of the best schools in all of China. Bejing was a blast. Met so many interesting people and saw so many new things it was a blast!
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Its a place that has always intrigued me. China and Thailand in fact! I will definatley visit it one day!
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Stephen,
The Chinese eating traditions seem much like traditional Sicily - family style that everyone eats from, lots of toasts, and pressure to eat until you explode!
You mentioned that you really like Guilin. What would you say is your favorite place in China?
Thanks,
Jenn